Reflections from the Heart of the Empire: 4/20 Weekend Edition

Aging stars and villains, I have achieved the Number of the Beast, and more

• My wife and I drove down to the Hartville Flea Market in Stark County, Ohio to take a mini-road trip and see this guy, who looks pretty damned good for 93, and reportedly even knew which state he was in.

• No, we didn’t pose for a photo or get an autograph or anything, and you had to pay $50 for a photo and not as much but still a lot for an autograph, so we just got within 30 feet and smiled & waved. William Shatner saw me. I was the tall guy in the cool black Australian-style bush hat, Bill.

• This place, which is a huge indoor flea market, was packed. Unbeknownst to us, the whole Dukes of Hazzard cast was there, with the car called General Lee(a Dodge Charger that somehow looked smaller than it did on TV), some pro wrestler and a football or basketball player doing the same thing my favorite over-actor who laughs at himself was doing. This here’s Daisy Duke today,

• Now, don’t get all upset over a Confederate flag on a toy car from a “politically incorrect” TV show from 40 years ago. Nobody displaying that flag anywhere these days is committing a genocide, and nobody was hurting anybody at the flea market. There were also black people getting autographs from the cast of the Dukes who seemed as excited as the aging nerds in Starfleet uniforms lining up for Shatner. C’est la vie in Ohio.

• No, to find genocidal racist maniacs in this illustrious year of 2024, we must go to Israel, where National Security Minister Itamar Ben Gvir tweeted either “Lame!” or “Feeble!” to reports of the thankfully feeble Israeli “counterattack” on Iran. This is a 21st Century photo of a fanatical warmongering ethnic cleanser,

  

• Gvir looks almost cuddly, in a svelte Hermann Goering kind of way, yet more comfortable with his madness. Yes, he’s quite mad. He wants World War III. That’s alarmingly dangerously mad. But wait! There’s more!

• Gvir expressed outrage after seeing photos like this one of Palestinian children playing on the beach in Gaza.

Gvir lamented that scenes like this convince him that “absolute victory” is getting “further and further away.” The puir, wee monster had a sad.

• Then there’s James Bond villain mad. Klaus Schwab was rumored to be hospitalized or dead, but the Associated Press assures us that the WEF chairman is alive and well. What’s interesting is that Politico published an in-depth article early last year describing just how weirdly James Bond villain-like that whole family, which has control of the WEF business, is, and how nobody really knows what will happen after the old vampire finally steps into direct sunlight once too often.

• The US House of Misrepresentatives voted for a quarterly budget of $61 billion for Ukraine, $26 billion for Israel, $8 billion for Taiwan, and $0 for anything to help American citizens. To see how “your” congresscritter voted for any of these three bills, click here.

• The Russian military will display a captured German Leopard tank in Moscow soon. Isn’t it nice of Congress to make sure they can continue putting on such shows?

• The Russians are reporting that Ukraine is actively targeting Russian journalists in the war zone. If there is anything the US Empire is consistent about, it’s targeting journalists. Lara, Assange, at least several dozen in Palestine. Ah, consistency!

• Even though recreational marijuana is now legal in Ohio, medical marijuana dispensaries won’t be able to sell it until June 7. New dispensaries won’t be able to do so until September 7. Enjoy your summer boom, dispensaries across the Michigan border and the Seneca Nation in western New York!

• Be afraid, stodgy pot-phobes of Indiana, Kentucky, West Virginia, and western Pennsylvania, be very afraid. Legal weed will be just across your border in a few months. Look for dispensaries at the first Ohio exit and lots of weed-filled billboards coming soon!

• The US Empire has agreed to withdraw its military forces from Niger. There was great rejoicing.

• Two drunken vultures were sobered up by a Connecticut animal activist group and released after eating…something…fermented in a dumpster. No charges were filed against the buzzards. I guess they have no flying under the influence laws there.

• Finally, a a very special shout-out to all of my new subscribers, notably in Egypt, Saudi Arabia, India, Sweden, Finland, Afghanistan, Algeria and Switzerland, who have boosted my subscription count to the magical Number of the Beast.

Thank you for reading, have a great rest of your weekend, and good luck.

If you like my scribbling, please consider a most inexpensive monthly subscription or a one-time donation by buying me a beer so I can keep scribbling.